EEEE READERS. I'M STILL HERE. MY FRED HAS MOVED OUT, HE'S FOUND GOD SO HAS GONE OFF TO A RETREAT. I'M REALLY PLEASED FOR HIM, AS A MOTHER YOU WORRY ABOUT YOUR SON AND IT SEEMS HE'S REALLY GOT A FRESH OUTLOOK ON LIFE NOW. I'M NOT SURE I TOTALLY AGREE WITH THE ACTUAL RELIGION SIDE OF IT, BUT TO BE HONEST, IT'S GOT HIM OUT OF A RUT SO FOR THAT I AM GLAD. I CAN'T GET THESE CAPITAL LETTERS OFF AND ME NEPHEW DAZZA IS BACK AT SCHOOL AGAIN SO I'LL JUST HAVE TO KEEP TYPING IN CAPITALS. MIND YOU I CAN WORK THE SPELLING SO IT TELLS ME IF I'VE TYPED SOMETHING WRONG. WELL I THINK IT DOES I CAN NEVER BE SURE AND I DON'T TRUST MYSELF WITH THESE COMPUTERS.
SO I HAVE BEEN WATCHING A LOT OF TELEVISION RECENTLY, MAINLY BECAUSE THE WEATHER HAS BEEN SO BAD RECENTLY. WHEN YOU GET TO MY AGE YOU DON'T WANT TO RISK GETTING SOAKED. EEE THAT REMINDS ME, I'VE GOT ONE OF THEM MICROWAVE OVENS NOW. IT MAKES A CUP OF COFFEE IN TWO MINUTES. NOT THAT I DRINK COFFEE. I DON'T LIKE IT. I DRINK TEA. BUT YOU CAN'T PUT TEA BAGS IN THE MICROWAVE SO I MAKE DO WITH THE KETTLE. THE KETTLE WAS ALL LIMESCALED UP LAST WEEK SO CECIL DESCALED IT. LOOKS BRAND NEW. HE GOT THE LIMESCALE REMOVER FROM THE HARDWARE SHOP AND GOT TO TALKING TO THE MAN BEHIND THE COUNTER. APPARENTLY LIMESCALE ONLY HAPPENS IN HARD WATER AREAS SO HE RECOMMENDED A WATER FILTER, WHICH I THOUGHT WAS VERY NICE. VERY NICE. CECIL THEN GOT ME A LOVELY STRAWBERRY CREAM SCONE FROM THE BAKERY, OOOO IT WERE LOVELY IT REALLY WERE.
SO CECIL CAME BACK AND HE TOLD ME TO PUT MY FEET UP, AND HE MADE ME A LOVELY DINNER. IT WERE ROAST BEEF, ROAST POTATOES AND PEAS. LOVELY. LITTLE THINGS LIKE THAT MAKE LIFE SPECIAL, AND CECIL IS VERY SPECIAL TO ME. HE'S ALWAYS BEEN THERE FOR ME. I..M SORRY, I'M GETTING ALL EMOTIONAL. HE'S A GOOD MAN. I'VE ALSO MADE FRIENDS AGAIN WITH MY DAUGHTER. I THOUGHT TO MYSELF, LIFE IS TOO SHORT FOR PETTY GRUDGES. SO SHE COMES ROUND THREE TIMES A WEEK AND WE GO TO THE SHOPS. WHEN I THINK OF ALL THE MONTHS I WASTED WITH MY STUBBORNESS, IT MAKES ME SAD, IT DOES. BUT ME DAUGHTER SAID 'MUM, IT'S NOW THAT MATTERS'. SO THAT'S WHAT WE DO - WE MAKE THE MOST OF NOW. AND I HAVE TO SAY, IT'S GIVEN ME A NEW LEASE OF LIFE.
I WENT TO SEE THE DOCTOR THIS WEEK, HE'S GIVEN ME A CLEAN BILL OF HEALTH, WHICH AT MY AGE, IS GOOD NEWS INDEED. I TAKE ME VITAMINS EVERY DAY, AND EAT AN APPLE, A BANANA AND A QUARTER OF AN ORANGE. YOU CAN NEVER HAVE TOO MUCH FRUIT, THAT'S WHAT I SAY.
FUCKING BITCH WHORE CUNT BITCH. THAT'S WHAT YOUR WAITING FOR ISN'T IT?
2 comments:
ETHEL I WISH YOU WOULDNT SHOUT ALL THE TIME THATS WHAT CAPITAL'S ARE FOR TO TURN THEM OFF PRESS THE KEY CALLED NUMB LOCK ANYWAY DO YOU REMEMBER ME FROM THE 1950S I THINK I TAUGHT YOU THE N WORD IM MARRIED TO A LOVELY BLACK MAN NOW AND HES VERY NICE NOT THE LEAST LIKE THOSE POEMS WE USED TO WRITE LOVE VERA
Eeee... Vera! Eeee I thought you were dead. It must've been someone else had cancer. I always thought it were you. I've got your carriage clock just in case your looking for it, you promised it to me when you passed on. Do you still here from Minnie? I hope not. She was a two faced cow and I'd say that to her face, the two faced cow. Eee and that's swearing.
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